Again it’s been hard for this (fa) to write. And when its hard for this (fa) to write...we go to the art supply store and shop… power new beautiful micron pens in hunter green, burgundy and super fine black and a watercolor moleskin book, holy – meaning undiluted or tampered with.
U know how when you first heard about knowledge wisdom cipher you had an image of an ancient text that held all athe secrets of the universe. Well this obsessively tactile nature was so visually hurt to have xeroxed pages handed to her… and instructed to create a “binder” to organize the science of everything in life?! Well since doing the knowledge to my self’s nature the ritual of buying an empty book and devoting its pages to knowledge wisdom cipher makes my self content.
Agha told me that since I have 3 planets in Gemini that there are essentially seven bitches in me… so you can imagine what the internal conversation is like...
There is always so much dialogue on the right way and whose way is the right way for self and how to define the self right way without being self righteous? What tools does one use to determine the right angle and who manufactured that tool? How much longer will we be making noise regarding right versus right and exact and again whose tools determine the exact measurements of right(ous)ness? Is the truth still the truth after you translate it? Does it matter how big or small my square is? What if I need some personal space? Can I be independent without being rebellious? Can I have god brothers and god fathers and god suns and god lovers? How much is too much? Who sets the parameters? Aren’t I the best knower of the internal workings of the earth?
I told u once before that the twin gypsies “believe” my self to be “psychic”. I assure and re-assure them that I just do the knowledge and thereby might have a natural vision for the larger equation.
When I do find that one will I be too deeply involved in my self to acknowledge him? That might be one of my biggest fears. I have written a list for him.
p.s. gimme some money for SOLAR! I appreciate U...enclosed is a picture of my holy book.
FaaTma Behesht Earth